in the beginning...

this is the thrilling origin story of my blog. somewhat paraphrased for entertainment.

[on facebook chat to Jess Guzman (check her blog out here http://guzmanface.blogspot.com/ )]
Jess: hey mitch, follow my blog!
Me: b..blog? teh fook is daht?
Jess: just read mine, you'll get it.
Me: ohhhhhhhhh, a BLOG.
Jess: yeah. they're not exactly new, you're pretty much retarded at internetting if you didn't know what one was.
Me: hmm, ok. im thinking that my blog will be a combination of my everyday happenings, insightful quotes/shit i pull out of my ass that sounds deep, and humorous concepts.
Jess: ok, sweet, what are you going to name it?
Me: what AM i going TO name IT?
Jess: it should just come to you. mine came to me while i had my period. hence the name :)
Me: I...see...
Jess: how bout...Borton hears a Boo 
Me: thats clever! TOO CLEVER. 
Jess: ahhhh, okay hmmm. teenage dandy boy? 
Me: lol GAY

Jess: how bout MITCH THE BITCH 

Me: YOU TAKE THAT BACK
Jess: NEVER

Me: the curious case of Ben Jam-In-Butthole?

Jess: okay. what will you blog about?
Me: buttholes. and lots of em.
Me: nah, i kid, kid. how about The Mind of Mitch: Within It, Without It?
Jess: OMG. i love it. can i have your babies?
Me: take a ticket and wait in line, biatch.
Me: oh, and i think i'll make my URL bortron engage.
Jess: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bortron LOL

Me: Who the FUCK is John Farell to diss my skateboarding and call me a nerd? Fuck John Farell.

AND FROM THAT DAY ON I REALISED THAT JOHN FARELL IS A CUNT.